Who Wants to be a Douchebagonaire?

It's been quite a while since I posted last, so I decided to do something kinda fun, and kinda serious. I write a lot about things I hate to encounter when I'm out driving. So for the hell of it I put together this quick little quiz, it's nothing special (trust me), but I hope it's at least interesting, otherwise I just blew 2 hours typing this dumb shit up. The scoring may be a little fucked up, but I'm sure you'll get the idea.

The Automotive Douche bag Quiz:

1. The automobile I use most often in my daily commute is a/an...
A)Small/mid-size car (0)
B)Mini-van (3)
C)Full-size SUV (5)
D)Pick-up/mini-SUV (3)
E)Luxury/sports/exotic car (2)

2. In a given speed zone (30,45,55,etc.), I drive...
A)10+mph under posted limit (20)
B)5-10mph under posted limit (5)
C)0-5mph over posted limit (0)
D)5-15mph over posted limit (5)
E)15+mph over posted limit (20)

3. On a highway I stay ____feet behind the car in front of me...
A)200+ (5)
B)100-200 (0)
C)50-100 (5)
D)20-50 (10)
E)20 or less (20)

4. I _____ talk on my cell phone when I’m driving...
A)Never (0)
B)Rarely (1)
C)Sometimes (5)
D)Often (10)
E)Almost Always (20)

5. My seating position when driving is...
A)Upright (0)
B)slightly reclined (1)
C)Leaned back (5)
D)leaning sideways over the center console (15)
E)my seats don’t recline (0)

6. The interior of my car...
A)Is spotless (0)
B)Is a little dirty (1)
C)Has some candy wrappers/ empty bottles (5)
D)Has a fair amount of garbage in it (10)
E)Looks like a landfill (20)

7. If another driver makes a small mistake (no turn signal, etc.), I...
A)Ignore it (0)
B)Call them an idiot to myself (1)
C)Honk or Yell at them (5)
D)Honk and Yell at them (10)
E)Follow them to their destination then lecture them about it (20)

8. When in traffic I play my radio...
A)I don’t play my radio in traffic (0)
B)Loud enough to hear with the windows up (0)
C)Loud enough to hear with the windows Down (1)
D)Loud enough so that people 4 cars away can hear (5)
E)So everyone in a 5 mile radius hears it (20)

9. The kind of music I listen to while driving is...
A)Nothing (0)
B)Rock/Alt./Classical (1)
C)Dance/Techno/Metal/Screamo/Emo (5)
D)Country/Talk Radio/Christian (10)
E)Pop music, and I sing along loudly off key ^___^ (20)
*multiply the score for this answer with your score on #8*

10. When I have my brights on and another car is approaching I...
A)Dim them right away (0)
B)Dim them at ~1/2 mile (1)
C)Dim them only if they flash their brights at me (5)
D)Keep them on no matter what (20)
E)I never use my brights when driving (2)

Total Score: (add up the numbers in parentheses behind your answers)

0-5: Not a douche- For the most part, at least when it comes to driving and road manners your a good person, and you add as little stress as possible to other people on the road, Thanks.

6-19: Kinda-A-Douche- Usually people will tolerate you since your only a minor annoyance, your probably safe, unless you meet up with someone with a short fuse, who just got laid off.

20-50: Certified Douche- Congrats, your a true blood douche bag. The way you act and present yourself on the road is usually enough to make most people avoid being around your car, even your friends think twice sometimes before going with when your driving.

51-100: Complete fucking tool- Your a driver that almost everyone (except for other tools) can’t stand dealing with, you spend most of your time cutting people off, yelling at other drivers, and blasting through red lights. Just so you can shave a few seconds off your commute.

100+: King Douche- Amazingly nobody’s followed you home yet, and killed you in your sleep. You manage to infuriate even the most forgiving of drivers with your asinine habits. No one wants to be a passenger in your car and given the choice most would walk, since they’re afraid of getting shot at by one of the many people you’ve pissed off.